Balloons

When you were a little kid didn't you just love to get balloons? One night when i was working at "the wal" (walgreens lol) there was this little kid riding around in the buggy and he had a balloon in his hand. I just knew what was about to happen though... and sure enough it did. He let it go. It wasn't a big deal because we got him another one, but i just thought to myself, "Now how many more times am i going to have to do that?" Sometimes when i was little i would just forget that the balloon was in my hand and it would float away. That was always a bummer.

 

I have been learning some really cool stuff lately and a few of my thousand plus questions have been being answered in the coolest ways. I love how God is working in my life right now. But to be completely honest, the better it gets the more paranoid i become. Sometimes i feel like i have to hold on to God so tight. I am so scared of losing sight of Him.

It's like im holding a balloon. I want to hold on to it because it's pretty and fun to play with, but sometimes i want to use that hand for something else. I dont want to let go though because i might not be able to reach it again. So i hold on to it. But what if i just forget that it's in my hand and i let it go? What if i don't notice that i've lost it?

 

All of these thoughts came to me last night (June 18) as i was writing to God. I have a really pretty journal that has verses on the bottom of each page. It's kind of funny how each verse somehow fits with what i was saying on that page (Very cool God!) So yesterday's verse was Matthew 28:20 "Surely I am with you always, to the very end of this age."

I cant really tell you this cool analogy that i made up to answer my question. All i know is that i have to trust the Bible. That is what it says and that is what im hanging on to until God decides to give me a further explanation. 

I dont know if anyone has ever felt like this. Heck, i might just be making a complete fool of myself. But this isnt about me. I want to help other people but im not going to write about what i think other people need.  I have to write about what is true in my own life because that is all i can do. I am the only person i can speak for. Maybe someone can learn something from it. This is what God is doing right now and that has to have some weight.

~peace.