There are some times, i'm sure we've all tried to do it, to make something, like a church service or a piece of scripture "feel spiritual". It's like we want to feel like we are growing more mature in our faith.
It is so dumb.
It only happens when im at a stand still or stagnant place in my faith. When nothing really good or bad happens, i either am a little scared because i think something bad is going to happen or i try to find that place where God spoke to me in the past.
When i do the latter, I end up getting so overwhelmed with all of the stuff im "doing for God" or i just give up and think my faith isn't good enough.
I know God is always working in my life, but it is a little unnerving when i can't see Him doing it. Do you know what i mean?
I feel like i always have to be busy, working my way to God...
God has been telling me that sometimes i can't do a dern thing about it.
Sometimes God just wants me to trust that He is there changing me even when i don't think He is. That He still speaks and i can listen if i can just stop what i'm doing and hear it. That i don't have to run after Him when i can't see him.
In those times i feel that instead of God leading me by walking ahead of me, or holding my hand along the way; that He is actually walking behind me, whispering in my ear, on occasion, the way to go. That He knows that i can walk on my own now and that I just need Him near enough to fall back on if i need to.
I know that God is still taking me somewhere, and that gives me this rested feeling.
"But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place." 1Cor. 2:14
May peace be with you.
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